Welcome to the Play Therapy Circle Podcast

Back to Basics: Tracking Plus Your Questions | EP43

This episode marks something new. Listener questions, answered on the show. And the question that came in was so good, it deserved real time and real depth.

But first: a back-to-basics teaching segment on tracking — one of the very first skills we learn in Child-Centred Play Therapy, and one of the most quietly powerful. What it sounds like, why it matters, and the common mistakes that are easy to make without realising.

Tracking is the skill of verbally following and reflecting a child's play and behaviour without leading, interpreting, or directing. It sounds simple. But done well, it communicates something profound: I am fully present with you, and what you are doing matters. It builds the relationship, honours the child's autonomy, and is unconditional positive regard in action.

Kylie walks through what tracking looks like in practice, the crucial difference between tracking the action and interpreting the meaning, and the most common mistakes new practitioners make including over-tracking, labelling, and questions disguised as tracking.

Then, your question:

Terri from Ireland asks about children who people-please, control, or go silent in the playroom directed toward the therapist. Through the lens of Lipton's developmental theory, Kylie explores these behaviours as relational templates formed in the earliest years and now being replayed in the playroom. Each one is an adapted survival strategy. Each one points to an unmet need.

Kylie unpacks all three with practical examples of how to respond, and when to move from simple reflection into enlargement and deeper reflective responding. She also addresses Terri's instinct about timing: that going too deep too early, before trust is established, can feel intrusive or even unsafe for the child. That instinct is exactly right.

The principle that ties it all together: reflection follows relationship. The depth of our responding should never outpace the depth of trust we have built.

Oh, and a milestone worth celebrating. The Play Therapy Circle Podcast is now reaching listeners in 70 countries. A genuine moment of gratitude for a community that continues to grow.

In this episode:

• What tracking is, what it sounds like, and why it matters
• The difference between tracking and interpreting, and why that distinction is crucial
• Common tracking mistakes and how to avoid them
• People-pleasing, controlling, and silence as relational templates and unmet needs
• Practical examples of reflective responding and enlargement for each behaviour
• Why timing matters: when enlargement helps and when it can harm
• Reflection follows relationship: the principle that guides it all
• A celebration of 70 countries and the global Play Therapy Circle community

Have a question you'd love answered on the show? Send it in via hello@playtherapycircle.com or find Kylie on Instagram @Playtherapycirclepodcast or @kylieellisontherapy.

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